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The middle school
years are a notoriously tumultuous time for parents and kids alike. Children
begin to mature rapidly, test their limits with authority and put an extremely
high priority on their social circle and the opinions of friends. In the midst
of all this change, parents can have a hard time convincing their kids that
school is still "job one."
Now more than
ever, students who "slack off" in middle school will find it causes
big problems when they hit high school and the new Regents requirements. Doing
well in middle school forms the foundation for success in high school - and
beyond.
So what can
parents do to help their child avoid the common pitfalls of middle school? We
asked social workers, guidance counselors, teachers and other middle school
parents just what makes a successful middle school student. Here is what they
said:
Organization
Meeting new
classmates, moving between classes without teachers and keeping on top of
assignments for five or more subjects can send a previously organized student
into an academic tailspin. To help kids take on the added responsibilities of
the middle school years, encourage them to:
a. Use a student
agenda notebook. Suggest they open the planner at the beginning of each class
and leave it on their desk until they have recorded that day's homework
assignment. Encourage them to review their assignments before leaving school to
make sure they bring home the appropriate books and materials. At home, remind
them to look at the planner instead of trying to work from memory. It is also
great for helping kids remember lessons and extracurricular activities, as well
as the supplies they'll need.
b. Use color-coded
folders or binders to keep track of the supplies and paperwork for each subject
(i.e., a blue folder, notebook and book cover for history, red for Spanish
materials.)
c. Store school
supplies in one place at home, and make it your children's responsibility to let
you know when they run low and need replacements.
d. Consider a
weekly family planning meeting - Sunday afternoon is often a good time to help
everyone get organized for the coming week.
Study skills
Unlike elementary
school, where teachers break assignments down into smaller parts, middle school
assignments are often more complex and require students to be more
self-directed.
To do well,
students should:
a. Spread project
and test preparation over several days instead of the night before a due date.
This gives kids time to do their very best work and ensures they're learning,
not just memorizing. Have kids schedule these prep sessions in their planners so
they're sure to be done along with other daily homework.
b. Establish a
regular time and place to do daily homework. As much as possible, be available
during this time in case your child needs help. Offer to quiz them as they get
ready for a test and ask to see their daily assignments -even those they say
they completed at school or before you got home from work. That way you'll know
if homework is being done.
c. Think beyond
the textbook. Though kids may look over their class notes in anticipation of a
test, to do well they need to learn to anticipate the types of questions they'll
be answering. You can help teach this skill as you quiz them (i.e., "If
you're asked to describe the main characters or the setting in the book Hatchet,
what will your answers be?")
d. When in doubt,
ask their teachers to explain assignments. Teachers will often give estimates on
how much time a project is likely to take or suggest what students should be
focusing on as they prepare for tests.
Finding the
balance between fun and work
Choosing to make
schoolwork a priority over socializing with friends is one of the biggest
challenges facing middle schoolers. To help kids put schoolwork first:
a. Institute a
work first/play later policy. On average, middle schoolers have one to two hours
of homework each day. This can be difficult to accomplish if they wait until 9
p.m. to start it. With "work first/play later," kids are expected to
get all of their work done before visiting friends, chatting online or playing
with the Gamecube. Explain that there will be consequences if this policy isn't
met, and be prepared to follow through.
b. Encourage
friendships with kids who take school seriously. Social workers say you should
be concerned if your kids don't ever talk with their friends about schoolwork.
Avoid the
"Why work hard?" trap
During the middle
years, many kids try to take the easy way out - they'd rather take a lesser
grade than put in the extra time and energy needed to do really well. To avoid
this trap:
a. Show them the
connection between their interests and what they're learning now. Maybe they
love art and computers and think they'd like to design Web sites some day. Let
them know that they're going to need a strong foundation in math in order to
accomplish this.
b. Offer praise
for a job well done. Though they may not act like your approval matters, it is
still very important and it does motivate them.
c. Celebrate their
successes. A family dinner out to celebrate a solid mid-year report can boost
their spirits and encourage them to keep putting in the effort.
d. Challenge them
to take on the more difficult course work. Sometimes a little nudge can make the
difference between coasting and really excelling. By tackling an advanced
placement class during eighth grade they'll also be freeing up time to take
desired electives in high school.
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